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IS YOUR BEHAVIOUR PURE

Sylvia Marina - Sunday, August 09, 2015

IS YOUR BEHAVIOUR PURE _ written by Sylvia Marina  

This week I had reason to recall a recent conversation with a business-person and remembered I had not yet shared it with you.


It may help you to understand on a deeper level why some relationships are difficult.

Here was my message at my business meeting. “Rage fuelled abuse hurled in words or actions is evidence enough to know something is not right.” 

Plus in another division of their business:  “Stark blank silence – people not communicating or only communicating part of the story.” 

This was happening in business but it happens too in personal relationships.

It reminded me of an interesting study. A group of scientists placed 5 monkeys in a cage and in the middle, a ladder with banana’s on top.

Every time a monkey went up the ladder, the scientists soaked the rest of the monkeys with cold water. After a while, every time a monkey went up the ladder, the others beat up the one on the ladder. After some time, no monkey dared to go up the ladder regardless of the temptation. 

Scientists then decided to substitute one of the monkeys. 

The first thing this new monkey did was to go up the ladder. Immediately the other monkeys beat him up. After several beatings, the new member learned not to climb the ladder.

A second monkey was substituted and the same occurred. The first monkey participated on the beating for the second monkey. 

A third, fourth and finally the fifth monkey – all experienced the beating but never knew why.

What was left was a group of 5 monkeys that even though they never received a cold shower of water continued to beat any monkey who attempted to climb the ladder.

It was impossible to ask the monkeys why they would beat up those who attempted to go up the ladder.

I bet their answer would be: I don’t know. That’s just how things are done around here.

This story is not new but the lesson is clear... Don’t follow others behaviour, think before you follow, think before you become part of a negative behaviour pattern.

At the business meeting I began to ask deeper questions, I discovered these behaviours were not recent, it was the reason management was speaking to me – they were searching for strategies on how to change a generation of destructive culture.

Naturally I began to speak of Getting The Love You Want...when people notice another getting the attention they feel should be there’s. If every-time they reach for the reward, affection, recognition! If everyone of those times they are discouraged, quickly an attitude of resistance creeps into the subconscious mind and soon a new behaviour is established - covert initially, then overtime like a virus if silently spreads until the problem seems almost impossible to heal, impossible to change. 

But change can happen if joy and the freedom of true joy and love is to be achieved – it’s not impossible.

Here is my five today tips to stop destructive behaviour.

  • Recognise where you are at 
  • Revisit your values
  • Realign with your values
  • Live intentionally
  • Recognise and applaud change

Focus on who you are now and who you are becoming.

2015© Sylvia Marina ND., 

THE HUMAN BEHAVIOUR SPECIALIST | SPEAKER | AUTHOR 

E: info@sylviamarina.com | W: www.sylviamarina.com 

FB: www.facebook.com/gettingtheloveyouwant

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